One of the supplements in today’s paper carries the heading What not to do when you’re 50 on the cover, and, as I’m 50, this grabbed my attention. There was a whole page article by Mariella Forstrup which I loved, but then the next page is The 21 rules for middle age by India Knight, who seems to think that we should really care how other people see us and what they think.
Rule number 1 states “you can’t go clubbing” and then explains that if young people see a middle-aged person at a nightclub, they laugh at them. Ergo, you shouldn’t. Because obviously middle age is the time to become all teenager-like and worry like hell about being laughed at. </sarcasm>
I went on reading anyway, until I got to rule number 16 and felt like throwing my ice cream in her face. “You can’t sit on a child’s swing at the park, swinging your legs girlishly,” she decrees. Why? “It feels charming, but it doesn’t look that great.”
Dear India Knight, if you want to spend your middle-age years refraining from doing fun things just because of how it looks, I feel rather sorry for you. If you want me, I’ll be out jumping in puddles. You’ll recognise me by the pink wellies.